I’ve Been Trying New Things

“After ten years we started to think. What if he never dies? We knew he would eventually die, but we were all getting older and he seemed to be ageless.” That was a quote I heard on the radio today from a Cuban who lived under Fidel. He was referring to the seeming endless years when Fidel was in his fifties, and he was in his late thirties. Why do dictators seem to live so long if not disturbed? (By disturbed I mean stabbed in the anal region with a knife and then having their body displayed–Gaddaffi) Maybe it goes back to something I mentioned a couple days ago (in this post) that people who are mentally delusional live longer because of being out of touch with reality. I don’t know why I keep starting with dictators. I like to make fun of people who cause millions of others pain, discomfort and misery. Next week I’ll make fun of The View.

The title is true! I have been trying new things. I decided to start making my bed every morning. Judge me if you will, but I use to question the purpose of making a bed that is only going to be messed up later that night. (Note: Just to clarify, I never applied that logic to showering, brushing my teeth or hygiene in general.) I would pull my sheets up, but I would never fully make it. I decided to start last week. I have to say, anyone reading this should make their bed in the morning. It doesn’t change the level of comfort, but it’s one of those things that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. For that feeling, I recommend morning bed making to everyone!

I listened to Lana Del Rey’s new album yesterday when I was in the photo lab. I know she received some really bad reviews from her SNL performance (reasons that are possibly true here). I had some reservations when I decided to Spotify her. Then I heard her song Off to the Races and maaaaan! Her voice is amazing! I have never heard a woman with a voice like hers. Honestly, her voice is like auditory sex. Just like the Porsche Panamera–the chocolate brown one–is sex on wheels. Cinnamon is the sex of things put on toast (Seriously, cinnamon is amazing). I haven’t filled the other five categories of things that are sex in their respective fields…I actually haven’t made the other five categories, yet.

I’m pretty sure my main demographic for this blog is the middle age women from my home town. I’m not sure how they (or you, if you fit that criteria) are going to like that I’m comparing the things above to sex. Honestly, I’m waiting until I get married…so the above analogies are possibly inaccurate. Except for the one about Cinnamon! I know that one must be true. After all, I had a churro after dinner. If sex isn’t exciting like a cinnamon churro…Well, what’s the point?

Oh!

That’s category number 4: Churro is the sex of Mexican treats that have been Americanized.

But I digress.

It’s 2:30 in the morning, but I was determined to get this out to my faithful readers! All 6.5 of you (that’s actually the number my stats sent me for one of the days last week)! This post has probably been offensive and weird, but it’s because I care! Peace!

I’ll leave you with two questions:

1. Do you like Lana Del Rey?

2. What is your favorite thing to eat that involves cinnamon?

Please leave your answers in the comments!

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2 thoughts on “I’ve Been Trying New Things

  1. Let me know how many hits you get, just because of all the sex in this post.

    Cinnamon rolls… that’s about it. Unless it’s like pumpkin roll or something. My older brother believes that EVERYTHING should have cinnamon in it. It gets annoying.
    I’ve never heard Lana Del Rey but I think I shall look up some of her music now

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